Rotten Bete Noire
by mrs cerberus
Summary: He put his shaking hand up to his pale chest. It felt as though the pulsating red pillar of life behind his skin would beat right out of it, and he hoped to catch it. [ AU, Drugs, Character Death, Yaoi ]
1. desperation

**DISCLAIMER**: I don't own anything, I just supply the drugs.

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_"Desperation is the raw material of drastic change. Only those who can leave behind everything they have ever believed in can hope to escape."  
-- William S. Burroughs_

It is nearing two in the morning, and a teenage boy is rummaging through his room frantically, scattering the drawers of his cherry wood wardrobe, throwing the clothes into a heap on the floor. Dragging his dull nails across the surface of the wardrobe, not finding what he's looking for, he turns and starts his pursuit elsewhere. He walks to his bed and shoves the mattress off, flipping it over and searching the silky, flower print material for the seam that he had sewn back up many times before. Feeling his fingers brush against the rough tell-tale stitching, he rips it open and digs his hands in, searching frantically and blindly, also to no avail.

"Shit, I have to have some stashed somewhere..." he mutters to himself, aquamarine eyes darting wildly and looking around his now-trashed room; drawers are scattered, clothes litter the ground and his bed lays a mess with some of the inner cushion ripped out. Leaving his room, he half-jogs down the hall, passing the bathroom and turning the corner, paying no mind to the noise he makes as he stomps noisily down the creaking wooden steps.

Finishing his descent, the teen stumbles into the living room, going directly to the couch to toss the leather cushions aside and reaching into the crevice. He finds nothing and checks each of the cushions in turn, unzipping them and digging his hand inside, then lifts them up to give them a rough shaking. Throwing them aside once more with a curse, he hurries over to the oak bookshelf, ripping the books off and letting them fall to the floor; he finds nothing but dust collecting. Yelling and cursing, the teen moves to the end tables by the couch and knocks the flower-print china vases to the ground, letting them shatter and running his hands through the shards. Still he finds nothing. Leaving this mess behind like the others, he turns on his heel and stomps across the room into the kitchen.

"Come on, come on," he spits, now digging through the silverware drawers. His hands are shaking something awful, causing the silver cutlery to clash together loudly despite his efforts to muffle it. Taking the drawer out completely, the boy tips it and dumps the contents onto the floor and inspects it closer. Turning away, he walks across the kitchen and bends down to look under the stove, reaching his hands under it, groping. He then stands quickly and gets dizzy; that's when the first wave hits him. He rushes to the trash can, doubling over it and vomiting. He made it in time to stop the real mess, but he still ends up with some trickling down the front of his shirt and splattering on the freshly polished oak flooring. He turns to the sink, running cold water and splashing his face with it, trying to get the fresh vomit off of his chin. He panics when he hears the stairs creaking once more.

"Riku, honey, is that you?" a voice calls, fading out as it reaches the bottom of the steps. "...What happened here? Were we robbed?!" She sounds strained as she turns into the kitchen and takes in the new sight of the scattered silverware and vomit that mingles on the floor. She gasps, and then looks to her son who appears to be the source of the commotion. Her aquamarine eyes, identical to his paranoid ones, widen in shock. "Riku, what's wrong?" She reaches out to him as her voice shakes, concern and worry wrinkling her pretty, yet tired features. "N-nothing... I'm fine. I just... I need to go out, mom," Riku stumbles over his own words, and goes to leave the kitchen through the back door, kicking the cutlery and utensils aside. He pushes his silver hair from his face nervously as he slinks by, avoiding her gaze. However, his mother puts a hand on his shaking shoulder and turns him, looking into his bloodshot eyes at the dilated pupils.

"Riku, what is going on? Are you sick?" Her voice is laced heavily with worry, and she tries to follow his gaze. She takes in the appearance of her son in his current state, and her eyes begin to water. "Your eyes... What's wrong with them? They've changed..."

"N-nothing is going on, just ... just get out of the way, mom," he says, his eyes darting frantically around the kitchen, as though looking for an escape route. "I need to get somewhere"

"You need to talk to me; what's wrong?" She presses the issue, squeezing his shoulder. "You're shaking... Are you cold? Do you need a doctor?"

"No, mom! I need to go! If you just let me go, I'll be fine, okay?!" He rips his shoulder from her nervous grip and steps back.

"What's wrong with you?!" she sobs. "I know you're doing something! You go out every night! You're gone constantly, you're so skinny, and you steal from us and miss school..." She moves forward and touches his hand. "You always want money, And you've changed so much in the past year..." Her eyes widen but her voice softens as realization hits her. "Have you been doing drugs?"

His eyes widen, and he stares at her blankly. Suddenly, his hands started shaking with rage and he stomps forward, pushing her roughly. "It's too late for that, mom!" He crosses the threshold of the living room and steps pointedly over towards the front door, slamming it open and walking into the night.

His feet beat the ground, following the familiar route he's taken so many times before. The crunching noise of the gravel under his shoes is the only sound that follows him on this warm summer night. He knows this path so well; his feet take the lead until he finally comes to a dark alley hidden between the bakery and the shoe department, walking into it.

Halfway down the alley, his knees start to quake and he topples over, throwing his hands out to catch himself on the rough asphalt that comes up to meet him. His palms, being as dried and cracked as they were, are scraped open and start to bleed a little. The fall has made him dizzy, and the sensation of vertigo overcomes him as he gets sick for the second time that night. His stomach retches until it seems empty and he is left with nothing but a dry gag. Pulling himself to his feet, he slumps over, using the rough brick wall to balance himself. His eyes flicker shut, weakly overlooking the alley.

Finally, the teen appears to find what he's looking for and pushes himself away from the wall, taking off in a sprint. Dodging a couple dumpsters in the alley, he stops when he reaches a red-headed figure leaning against a wall, apparently waiting for something.

"Please," he gasps, grabbing the man's arms, "I need a hit, anything. You have to help me out."

The man takes a cigarette from his lips and shakes his head, fiery spiked hair swaying with the motion. "You still owe me money, Riku," the man states coldly, shoving the teen away. "I'm not a goddamned charity. I don't even have any on me."

"Please, Axel... Please!" The boy falls to his knees, gripping the front of the man's hoodie. "I'll do... anything. Please," Riku sobs. The tall red-haired man shakes his head again, a look of disgust on his face.

"You're a fucking mess... come on," Axel grabs him by the arm, dragging him roughly to his feet and leading him out of the alleyway.

A few minutes later, they're walking up the creaking blue steps of an apartment complex, Axel leading the way. Reaching in and fumbling with some keys from his pocket, he unlocks and opens one of the doors, leading Riku inside. He tells him to sit on his couch and goes to the back of the apartment. Riku complies and sits, fidgeting on the lumpy brown cushions, picking at his arms because of his nerves. Suddenly, another wave of nausea rushes over him and he leans forward, gagging dryly. Nothing comes.

When Axel walks out of the back room, Riku jumps to his feet and approaches the man, determined. "Please, a-aren't you going to..." he begins, his voice shaking. He stares at Axel with paranoid aqua eyes; his teeth clatter together loudly when he shuts his mouth.

"Do you have my money?" Axel asks coolly, dismissing the boy's desperation. "I can't just go giving this shit away." Bright, cat-like green eyes stare at the wreck before them.

"I don't have any money, b-but I'll do anything. I _need_ some, please," Riku begs, his hands reaching towards Axel's hips, fumbling for the waistbands of his pants and underwear. "Anything," he whispers the word again, his glazed eyes meeting Axel's piercing green, though bloodshot, ones. Axel looks at him blankly, then nods his head and lets a smug grin play across his lips. This is why he likes the kid in the first place. He reaches his hands down, taking Riku's, and steps backwards, leading him into the bedroom, closing the door.

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**Author's Note**: This is a joint project written between myself and my friend gentlestep. ;D It was spawned from our sadistic minds one day when we decided AU Riku needed a drug addiction. I hope you read and review, as many more chapters are to come. 


	2. beginnings

_"The best way to keep one's word is not to give it."  
-- Napoleon Bonaparte_

"Come on, we're going to be late," Riku called to Sora, who was still fumbling with his locker. It was the first day of eigth grade, and though Riku wasn't worried in the least about being on time, he always liked to get a rise out of the spikey-haired brunette that was his best friend. A broad grin stretched across his face as he heard the effect these words had on Sora.

"Uh... hang on! I can't find my notebook!" Sora called to the back of Riku's head, digging drastically through his locker. Sora had no intention of being late on the first day, and started to panic a bit as the crowd behind them started to clear out to their classrooms. Jumping a bit, he was startled when the arm of Riku reached slowly over his head and in one swift move, pulled out a bright green notebook that bore the legend of "ENGLISH" in black sharpie and dropped it into the limp hands of Sora, who blinked stupidly. "Uh, thanks!" Standing up, he pushed his locker closed and scratched his head briefly, before turning to follow Riku who had already started towards their first class.

They made it to their classroom right before the bell rang. Sora looked hasseled and slightly irritated, while Riku looked calm and collected as they strolled into the classroom together.

"Chill out... See, we made it in time, didn't we?" Riku yawned.

"Well, we could have been late," Sora mumbled, following Riku to the back of the class and taking a seat next to him. He sat down and promptly began to take out the same green notebook he had been fretting over before, shooting a glance at Riku to see if he was following suit. Giving Sora a slight wink, he too bent down to open his bag respectively, pulling out the same supplies.

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Having always looked up to Riku, Sora tried to push himself to succeed and be the best at whatever it was he tried to do. However, the one thing Sora couldn't emulate was the apparent lack of effort Riku put into things. This was what started the conversation that day at lunch.

"You know, I just don't get it," Sora said dramatically as they walked over to their lunch table, setting his red plastic food tray down on the table with a little more force than he meant to use. "You get such good grades, it doesn't make sense. You hardly put any effort into anything..." he finished, words fading into a mumble as he sat down across from Riku, sulking a bit.

"Oh, it just comes naturally to me," Riku said nonchalantly, leaning forward and taking the apple from Sora's tray. "I hope you didn't want this?"

"No, it's alright, you can have it... I just don't get it, I work hard to get my grades you just... have them," Sora sighed, dejectedly.

Riku flipped his silver hair off of his shoulders before biting into the apple. "I just... understand it. I don't know. But I don't really see why I should worry about any of this crap. You can memorize numbers all you want, but it doesn't teach you anything about the real world." Another bite of apple was taken, and he paused to chew as Sora raised his eyes at him, a look of concern on his face. "The only thing I'm worried about, Sora, is getting to high school. I'm sick of being a fucking middle schooler."

Sora looked down at his food with a frown. "Well, it won't be fun being a freshman either, so you have a while to go." He poked his food around.

Riku opened his mouth to reply when the bell rang over their heads.

"Ugh, I have math next..." Sora said, gathering his things, appearing keen to cut the conversation short. "Have fun in science."

The two friends made their separate ways, with Sora heading for his math class upstairs and Riku heading nearby for Science. He made his way to an open desk in the back of the classroom and took his seat.

"SEIFER!" the teacher called suddenly, making quite a few kids jump and crane their necks in search of the commotion, "You know you're not allowed to wear head gear during class! I told you that countless times last year; now take that hat off and make sure I don't see it again." She watched him, and then turned back to the board.

The boy called Seifer took his black beanie off, pouting in a very sarcastic manner. Riku sighed, pulling out his notebook and turning to the front of the class, prepared to take notes. Suddenly, the girl sitting in front of him turned to face him and addressed him.

"You're Riku," she stated, rather than asked. Riku gave an nod in response, and blinked. "You hang around that Sora kid."

"Yeah, and your point?" Riku asked grumpily. He looked around at the three kids sitting around him in a corner-shape, and realized he recognized them. Seifer, the boy the teacher had apprehended earlier was the self-proclaimed 'leader' of the group. His cronies, Fuu and Rai, were hardly ever seen without him.

Fuu, the girl that sat infront of him and that had addressed him first, was quiet, yet sarcastic. She hardly ever gave answers or responses more than a few words long, and it was still up for debate why she hung out with Seifer. She had shoulder-length silver hair like Riku's but it was shorter and covered half of her face, shielding one of her reddish-violet eyes from view.

Rai, the dark-skinned boy that sat infront of Seifer, caddy-corner from Riku, seemed to be more dumb muscle than anything. Most of the time he seemed to speak without really understanding what he was saying, and could generally be seen depending on Seifer's directions, which he followed without a second thought.

"So why do you hang around with that Sora kid? You don't seem like a total pansy," Seifer said, crossing his arms and putting his feet up on the desk in front of him.

"Because I want to," Riku replied, agitated. It was quite clear by this point that they wouldn't leave him alone. "What do you want?"

"You don't have to be rude, y'know," the thuggish figure of Rai said. "We're just trying to be nice."

"Yeah, don't get all pissy, dude," Seifer said, smirking.

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A couple months had now passed since the beginning of school, and it was now the first Monday of October. Riku found that the deep monotony of the school day itself, however, hadn't changed at all, and at the end of his last class, he rushed to meet up with Sora in the foyer of the building to walk home together like always. Riku was particularly trying to see him a lot lately, because his friend was going to be going out of town to visit a relative unexpectedly. When they were about to leave, Riku heard his name being called from somewhere near one of the pillars.

He looked for the source of the voice, and dropped his face a bit when he saw the same black beanie and smug blue eyes from his last class. Seifer...

Despite the fact that Seifer and his gang had made a bad impression back on the first day of school, Riku found that he gradually got used to them. Sitting next to them everyday in science, Riku learned that maybe they weren't so bad when you only had to put up with small doses of them. Still, even though he'd gotten used to them in class, this was one of the few times he'd been acknowledged outside of class. Curious, he tapped Sora on the shoulder to stop his progress and turned to face the smug face of Seifer.

"Hey, we're having a party this weekend, you wanna come?" Seifer said casually, strolling away from his two cronies. He seemed to be asking Riku more than Sora, but it was Sora who replied.

"No, we have homework to do, and I'm going to be out of town anyway," Sora said, dragging Riku along. When Sora wasn't looking, Riku nodded his head at the three, who smirked in reply.

"Who would want to waste their time on silly parties?" Sora mused in a very irritated tone. He looked at Riku curiously when he didn't reply. "You're not thinking about going, are you?"

"What...? Oh, I don't know. You're going to be out of town and I won't have anything to do," Riku said, withdrawing under Sora's harsh glare. "Don't worry; I won't get into any trouble. It's a middle school party, what can possibly happen?" The brunette didn't look completely convinced, however, and gave only a half-hearted wave when he turned the block that lead to his house, leaving Riku to walk the extra two blocks alone.

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It was Friday, and an air of relief flooded the halls as yet another week of school drew to a close. Sora had been absent since Thursday, and wouldn't be returning until Tuesday. He'll love that, Riku thought to himself, missing almost a week of school... His thoughts were interrupted as Seifer stopped him on his way off of the campus.

"So, what do you say? Are you coming?" he asked, lighting a cigarette. "Or will your little friend get mad at you?" He took a drag.

"My 'little friend' can't tell me what to do," Riku scowled, turning to walk home. Suddenly, he stopped and turned to face Seifer, who hadn't moved and was wearing a triumphant grin. "Where and when is it?"

"It's tomorrow night, out in the field behind that old barn," he said importantly. "People will probably start arriving at five, so you can just come whenever."

Riku nodded his head and turned again without saying another word to the kid, starting home.

Finally, he reached his house, turning the doorknob and letting himself inside, kicking his shoes off and throwing his bag into the corner. He wandered into the kitchen, where his mom was sitting at the table, reading the paper and smoking a cigarette.

"Mom, I'm staying the night at Sora's tomorrow," Riku said, without saying hello.

"That's fine," she mumbled, her aquamarine eyes not looking up from her paper. She took another long drag off of her cigarette. Riku turned and scowled at the back of her head. He knew he told her yesterday that Sora was going out of town. However, he should have expected her to not pay attention. Rolling his eyes, he turned back to the fridge and grabbed a soda, then jogged upstairs to his room.

Sitting on the edge of his comfortable bed, he popped the Coke can open and took a drink, then set it on the wooden bedside table next to him. He felt a pang of guilt, thinking of what Sora would say if he found out that Riku planned to go to the party. Sora had Riku's best interests at heart, after all. But it's just a party with a bunch of stupid fourteen-year-olds, he reminded himself, so nothing would happen.

Suddenly, it was apparent that his father had just gotten home, when noise erupted from the lower level of the house. Today, he was mad about the house not being clean enough.

Riku rubbed his temples as he hoped the scene didn't make its way upstairs.

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The next day, he took off down the steps of their porch around four-thirty, wanting to leave before his dad got home. His mother sat on the couch watching television, her eyes glazed as the light from the screen flashed across her face, and didn't even notice as her son ran out the front door, yelling good-bye. He darted down the porch steps and started off down the street. He tucked his arms into his shirt, regretting greatly that he didn't bring a jacket because it was quite chilly today. Shaking his head, he continued walking in a determined manner, not wanting to have to go back home.

He turned the corner to the next block and made his way to the old barn. He stopped for a minute to check his surroundings, since he hadn't visited the decrepit building since he and Sora were younger and didn't fancy getting lost in this cold weather. Once he assured himself that he was going the right way, he pushed forward until he saw smoke coming from what appeared to be a bonfire. He saw the barn, sitting lonely in the distance.

"At least there's a fire..." he said, giving a small shiver and realizing how cold he was. "Still, seems silly, I can see it all the way over here. The stupid cops will probably notice." Shaking his head, he made his way to the group of people he could see silhouetted in the distance.

When he walked into the group, he was surprised at what he saw. He had expected a bunch of fourteen-year-old boys to be sitting around the empty field, drinking the alcohol that they managed to steal from their parents. However, upon approaching the group, he realized he could only see a few kids his age present. The rest appeared to be kids in the upper grades of high school, and some looked like adults. Broken bottles and cigarette butts already littered the ground surrounding the fire, and Riku could smell something he didn't recognize in the air.

"So, you actually came," teased the drawling voice of Seifer, who had jumped from his seat on the hood of an old rusty pick-up truck to clap Riku on the back. "Pretty cool party, huh?"

"Everyone here looks older than us," Riku said, looking around the scene, taking in the different people.

"Seifer's brother is throwing the party, y'know?" Rai said, crossing his muscular arms.

"What were you expecting?" Fuu crooned, looking even more apathetic than Riku thought he himself could muster.

"I don't know, not this I guess," Riku shrugged, sounding a bit impartial.

"Come on, don't just stand there looking stupid," Seifer said, putting his arm around him in what was supposed to be a friendly gesture. He dragged Riku over to the other side of the fire where a group of kids sat on a circle of haystacks, a couple logs and one of two beat-up lawn chairs, passing around a sloppy cigarette. Seifer looked around at the group. "Okay, you guys wait here, I'll go get some."

Riku took a seat with Rai and Fuu on a haystack, watching Seifer's progress as he made his way across the field, approaching another group of kids. He walked pointedly up to one with flaming red hair that came back in spikes, and sat next to him. Riku watched closely as they interacted; the man was striking.

When Seifer first walked up, the boy seemed to be in a deep conversation with some of the kids around him, looking agitated at being interrupted. Riku couldn't really see his face, as it was dark and Seifer stood in the way most of the time, but after a brief conversation the red-head reached into his pockets, digging something out and handing it to Seifer, accepting some money. Turning away from the scene, he made his way back towards the area where he left Riku sitting.

"So," came the voice of Seifer once he reached the group again, "This is all I've got, so don't hog it."

"Whatever," said Fuu, moving as Seifer shooed her aside to claim her seat, which was right next to Riku. Riku watched as he dug into his pocket, extracting a dull red lighter and a cigarette that resembled the one the group next to them was passing around. Even Riku, who had never been around drugs much, could put two and two together. His eyes narrowed slightly in interest as he watched Seifer put the end to his mouth, glad that it was too dark for his expression to be noticed. He didn't want to look like and idiot in front of this group of older people. Already deciding what he was going to do, he leaned back casually and used his peripherals to closely watch what Seifer was doing so he didn't look stupid when the time came. A nervous jolt of consciousness sent his heart into his throat, but he swallowed hard and ignored it.

In one swift motion, Seifer brought the lighter up to the end of the joint and lit it, inhaling deeply then pulled it away from his mouth, holding his breath for a few seconds then letting out a deep cough that sent heavy clouds of smoke flying out. He nudged Fuu on the shoulder and passed the joint on, then turned to Riku.

"Strong stuff, man," he said once his coughing fit subdued a bit, though a cough or two had to be fought down as he tried to speak. "I wish I had my bong, makes it go down smoother." Clapping Riku on the shoulder, he laughed and craned around Fuu to talk to Rai. Riku forced a laugh himself as he leaned forward a bit, watching each person in turn smoke some of the joint.

Before he could really ponder the reason everyone in turn had gone into the same coughing fit as Seifer, Riku found both the joint and the lighter being handed to him. Taking them in each hand, he pinched it between his index finger and thumb, turning it a little bit to buy time. Seifer watched for a minute to see what he'd do, but Riku's reaction looked satisfactory so he turned back to Fuu and Rai, finishing their conversation. Riku was ready for it, he'd watched all the others and now understood how it was done. It didn't look that hard, why was everyone hacking up a lung? Lifting the joint up to his mouth, he lit the lighter. Even if he hadn't paid attention to what the others were doing, he'd seen his mother smoke cigarettes countless number of times before, so he knew you had to inhale while the end was in the flame. He was ready it seemed, knew what to expect. He looked like he knew what he was doing as he lit the end and took a big rip--

He would have been ready for the taste if he had taken into account the strong smell of it surrounding him, but by this point he had been sitting around the stuff for a good twenty minutes and had simply gotten used to it, driving it from his mind. As soon as he lit the end and took a deep inhale, the taste had caught him off guard and he went into a horrible coughing fit, sputtering and gasping. Bending forward, he put his free hand on his knee and made attempts to draw in breath, but his throat burned from the mixture of the pot and the fresh coughing fit and he succumbed to even more hacking. He felt a hand slapping him hard on the back, and the shock of it made him draw in a deep breath. He looked up into the face of Seifer, who had been the one slapping him and knew from the smirk on his face that he knew all too well this was Riku's first time.

"Told you it was rough, man," he said, laughing a bit. Riku was thankful he hadn't said it too loud, as the others didn't seem to take any notice of the episode. "Next time, start a bit smaller." Still laughing, Seifer grabbed the remaints of the joint and the lighter, then took a last drag off of it before stomping it out on the ground.

_If there is a next time_, Riku thought bitterly. 

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**Author's Note: **Finally got around to getting this up. My net died for two months so I've been working on it, and should have a Chapter Three coming very soon. The part with the party took the longest, as there were so many directions to take there... So I hope it works well for anyone who reads it, as I did put alot of thought into it.

Thanks for reading and remember, I don't own anything.


	3. honesty

_"The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made." -- Groucho Marx_

The weekend came and went, and when Riku returned to school Monday it was the same as usual: Uneventful. In reality, Tuesday was the day he feared. Sora would finally return to school after nearly a week out, and Riku could already picture the accusatory gaze Sora would give him. Sure enough, as soon as they met up to walk to school, the first thing Sora had asked was about the past weekend.

"So, what did you do while I was gone?" he asked, trying to sound casual and carefree, but failing at hiding the accusatory edge in his voice.

"Nothing, really. Homework, you know, the usual," Riku replied, shooting him a glance as he walked and watching as Sora raised his eyes. "I showed up at the party for a bit and hung out with Seifer," he continued, turning his head more to meet his gaze. Opening his mouth to make a retort, Sora was quickly silenced as Riku spoke. "Look, nothing happened. It's no big deal. Relax." Riku was starting to get a bit irritated. He could understand his friend showing concern for him, but this was getting ridiculous. The walk continued in silence, though Sora showed every sign of wanting to break the peace.

After a few days, it seemed as though everything was back to normal. Sora started to lay off of Riku, and when he did ask questions about what happened, they were more curious than stern. Sora himself had never been to such an event, and Riku had answered them more willingly. Once Riku gave more details (leaving out a few things, of course), Sora appeared completely convinced that nothing had happened.

It was a couple of weeks later when Seifer nudged Riku on the shoulder during Science. Finishing off the line of notes he was writing, he lifted his head and looked at Seifer expectantly, eyebrows raised.

"Hey," he said in a low whisper, checking to see the teacher was distracted. "Want to come hang at my place tonight? My old man is out of town and said I could have a couple people over."

"Tonight?" Riku said, playing for time as he thought. Finally, he shrugged his shoulders and nodded. "I guess, where do you live?"

Seifer reached over to Riku's notes, tore a corner off the page and started to write down his address and phone number. "Don't get lost, dude." He smirked and threw the piece of scrap paper back towards Riku, then folded his arms on the desk and put his head down, eventually dozing off.

After school, Riku walked home with Sora as usual.

"Hey, are you doing anything tonight?" Sora asked, looking up from his feet and towards Riku. "We could go catch a movie or something."

"Well... Seifer invited me over to hang out; his dad is out of town," Riku said casually, deciding it was best not to lie. Really, what was there to hide? Sora raised his eyebrows slightly.

"Seifer? Since when did you hang out with him?" His tone didn't sound jealous or anything of the sort, like Riku had expected, but curious.

"Well, we mostly just talk in Science, you know. He's not so bad once you get used to him," Riku shrugged. "Maybe tomorrow or this weekend we could catch a movie. I'll pay."

"Yeah, maybe. Well, see you later," Sora said, turning off at his street. Riku looked at him curiously, then waved. Shaking his head, he continued to walk home.

The rest of the walk home was one slightly troubled, as Riku felt a slight pang of guilt. Besides a few others, Sora was really the only person he ever hung out with, so this sudden switch in routine made him feel like he was ditching his best friend.

But he began to think. "So what if I want to do something else for once? And Seifer asked first." He'd hang out with Seifer tonight, and simply make it up to his friend with a movie some other time.

When Riku got home, he deposited his bag by the door as usual, and took the little shred of paper with Seifer's address and number out of his pocket. Studying it, he wandered into the kitchen to get a drink, where he found his mom sitting, as usual.

"Hi, honey," came her vague voice from the table as she flicked the ashes off the end of her cigarette. "Nice day at school?"

"Yeah. Mom, can I go to Sora's tonight? He needs help with his homework and wanted me to come over," Riku said.

"Oh," she said, not taking her eyes off the paper. "That's fine. What time will you be home?"

"Well, we were hoping to watch a movie and play some video games after, if that's okay," he added blandly, knowing she didn't really care. She usually just asked all these questions to appear like a concerned parent, but generally they held no bearing.

"Oh, okay. Just don't be too late," she replied, finally setting down the paper and taking one last drag off her cigarette. Riku merely nodded in response, knowing she'd take no notice of what time he got home. She gave him a bland smile, and added, "Be good, okay?"

"I will."

--

Before turning onto the next street, Riku gave the paper one last look to make sure he was going the right way. He'd left almost as soon as he got home, and he remembered Seifer never said what time to get there. Even though he had to stop a few times to check the street signs that were either worn and rusty or obscured by hanging tree branches, he hoped he wasn't too early. Finally, after scanning the addresses of nearly every house this side of the street, he came across an old beat-up brick house. It looked okay, despite its wear. Gold plaque numbers on the front porch beam were rusty and flipped upside down, as though for a comic effect.

Discarding the scrap of paper into a nearby sewer, he made his way up the gravel driveway and onto the porch, knocking on the door and leaning against the porch railing, where the paint was chipping away.

"What took so long?" Seifer asked as the door creaked open, revealing him standing there with a bottle of beer in his hand. His face was as smug as ever, and Riku wondered if he could look any less smug even if he tried. "Come on in." Riku pushed the door open and entered, closing it behind him and followed Seifer into the house. Making his way through the living room, he stepped over spilled ashtrays and around mismatched furniture, then went through the kitchen and downstairs into the basement.

As soon as he started to descend the stairs, he could distinguish the heavy smell of pot wafting up. It was more prominent now than at the party, he noticed, but that could've been only because they were inside. Seifer led him to a corner of the room decorated by a couple mismatched chairs, a couch, an old television set and a number of shelves. Seifer flopped down into one of the chairs and waved a hand towards the open seat at the end of the couch. Riku took a seat, for the first time noticing Rai and Fuu. Rai was seated next to him on the couch, leaning foward and staring pointedly at the television. Fuu was laying in one of the armchairs, feet dangling over the end. Riku felt awkward sitting there silently, but couldn't really think of anything to say. The others didn't seem to notice or mind, so the group sat there in silence for a few minutes. Finally, Seifer broke the silence.

"So, what's up dude?" he said, looking over at Riku and taking a drink from the beer in his hand. Riku could see a couple bottles littering the ground around his chair.

"Nothing, really," Riku responded, leaning forward on the couch and trying to look casual.

"Want something to drink?" Seifer asked, finishing off his beer and dropping the bottle on the ground with the others, then standing up. Before Riku could respond, however, Rai spoke up.

"Yeah, get me one too," he said, waving an empty bottle at Seifer. Without addressing Riku again, he made his way back towards the steps. As he passed Rai, he stopped for a moment, then swiftly swung a fist out at the side to punch him in the stomach. Laughing, he jogged out of the way and up the stairs before Rai could punch back at him. Riku merely blinked at the scene, watching as Rai rubbed his stomach.

"Ow, that hurt, y'know?" Rai said as Seifer came back down, carrying four bottles of beer.

Seifer rolled his eyes. "You'll get over it," he replied, passing the bottles around, then taking his seat again. Riku looked down at his own bottle. He curled his fist around the cap, turning roughly and managing to pry it off. Looking around for a garbage can or something, he finally resorted to throwing the cap on the floor. Looking around at Rai and Seifer, he realized they didn't seem to notice or care, and proceeded to take a drink of the amber-colored liquid. He learned from his mistakes at the party, and didn't take too big of a drink in case the taste didn't agree with him. He was glad he was more cautious this time; it wasn't completely awful, but it was indeed one that would have caught him off guard. Spewing beer all over Seifer's floor would have been a great deal more embarrassing than coughing up smoke.

Once again, the group was quiet. Riku guessed that this was how it usually went when the three hung out after school, sitting around drinking. Riku just sat, taking small drinks of his beer and trying to fit in, waiting for someone to say something. He did feel a bit silly.

"Fuu, pass me the pipe," Seifer said suddenly, looking over at Fuu. Riku had almost forgotten she was there, since she was being the quietest. After sitting next to them in Science all year, however, he suddenly realized he'd hardly heard her speak. The first time she addressed him was the most he'd ever heard her talk.

Fuu rolled her eyes and set her bottle down on the floor carefully before standing up and walking over to one of the shelves on the wall and reaching up to grab something. This was the first time Riku paid any attention to the shelves in the room. He noticed now that they were mostly decorated with small, different colored pipes and weird, tubelike objects. He realized that these must be bongs. In health class they'd covered drugs, after all, and he wasn't stupid.

Finally, Fuu managed to extract a small, glass, purple-colored pipe, along with a small baggy. She walked over to Seifer and handed it to him before retreating across the room and taking her seat again. Seifer reached over to a table next to him and pulled out what looked like a small, wooden cutting board used for veggies and laid it across his lap, then set the pipe and bag on it.

"First," Seifer said suddenly, catching Riku off guard.

"Second."

"Third."

Blinking in bewilderment, he looked around at them. "Uh, fourth?" he said, unsure of what this meant. Was it some other game they played? Seifer looked over at him, smirking his all-knowing smirk.

"Sorry dude, last hit for you. Gotta be faster than that," he chided, then turned his attention back to the pot in his lap. Riku blinked. Finally, Seifer started to put pinches of pot into the pipe, packing it in slightly then reached over to the table once more, this time extracting a lighter. Putting the end of the pipe into his mouth, he lit it and took a deep inhale, coughing only slightly but managing to hold it in. Then he passed it to Rai who had called second. After he was done, the pipe was passed to Fuu, then finally she handed it to Riku. He looked at the pipe for a moment, hesitating.

"Try not to choke this time," Seifer said, for the first time acknowledging Riku's mishap at the party. Before he'd known Seifer, this would have irritated him. Surely they choked on it the first time they did it, too? But after sitting next to him in Science all year, and seeing more of him tonight, he was quite used to it. He liked to tease and prod people. Riku wouldn't give him the satisfaction of getting a rise out of him, however.

"I won't," he said, a bit more confidently than he felt. This time he was indeed ready for it as he put the end of the pipe to his lips, then lit the opening containing the pot. He took a much smaller inhale of it, which his lungs and throat were all the more thankful for and actually managed to hold it. Rai grabbed the pipe and lighter from him and handed it back to Seifer, and Riku finally let out a deep exhale when he felt he couldn't hold his breath any more. A good deal of smoke poured out, and he started to cough, eyes burning.

"Hey, there you go," Seifer laughed, starting on the pipe again. Passing it off to Rai, he let out a long exhale as he still looked at Riku, then leaned back in his chair. "Looks like you can fit in after all."

After Riku accomplished it once, he found it was getting easier and easier to do with every successive turn he had. Granted, he didn't feel much different, other than feeling slightly light headed, and he guessed that this was because it was the first time he'd actually smoked it. The others had eyes that were thoroughly bloodshot, and when Riku caught his reflection in the mirror above the TV, he saw his were only a faint pink. Feeling a bit more relaxed now (he didn't know if it was the pot or if he'd simply gotten used to sitting in the room), he started on his beer again, still taking small drinks from it.

"Just drink it, dude," Seifer said, shooting a glance at Riku, his cocky grin looking a bit wilted. "My old man has about twenty more in the fridge upstairs, and the bastard probably has forty hidden in the garage." Riku shrugged, swallowed and finished it off in one go. Setting the bottle down on the floor he leaned back on the couch, looking at the TV then glancing around the room. He saw Fuu curled up on her chair, looking as though she was about to fall asleep.

"Hey, what time is it?" Riku asked, feeling a bit more comfortable breaking the silence now. Seifer looked at him, then up at the stereo sitting on one of the shelves.

"Almost six," he said placidly, looking back at the TV. "Dude, let's turn this shit off, this show is getting old." Without waiting for the consent of the room, he picked up a remote and turned the TV off. Digging around for a moment, he pulled out another remote, aiming it at the radio, which turned on, loudly. Riku jumped a bit as the loud music pounded the speakers, and looked around to see he wasn't the only one who jumped. Fuu shot straight up in her chair, rubbing her eyes and Rai covered his ears.

"What the hell?" he called over the music, and only got howls of laughter from Seifer in response.

"Ugh," Fuu groaned.

"Room was getting dead, I had to spice it up," Seifer called easily over the music, still laughing. Riku, caught off guard at first, started to laugh too. Suddenly, directly above them they heard someone stomping on the floor. Seifer turned off the music for a moment to listen, amused. Apparently, someone upstairs was yelling.

"...and turn that shit down, Seifer!"

"Shut the fuck up!" Seifer yelled back at the ceiling before turning the music back on, though he compromised by turning it down a bit. "I wish my brother wouldn't be such a bitch." Leaning forward in his chair, he looked at Riku, before shoving Rai roughly on the shoulder. "Trade me spots."

Rai obeyed, and soon Riku found himself sitting next to Seifer. Riku wondered for a moment why Rai let Seifer bully him around, as it was obvious who was the stronger of the two. Then again, if Rai wasn't willing to be bullied, then it was likely the two of them wouldn't be friends.

"So, enjoying yourself?" Seifer asked, slurring a bit as he looked at Riku. Riku noticed that the pile of beer bottles surrounding Seifer's previous seat had grown quite a bit as the night progressed.

"Yeah," he said before thinking, though he wasn't sure if this was true. "This is cool, I guess," he added, to make it more convincing.

"You've been quiet all night, dude," Seifer said. Riku didn't bring up the fact everyone had been quiet. "Giving Fuu over there a run for her money, that's for sure. Lighten up, don't be such a stiff." Reaching into his pocket, Seifer pulled out a crumpled pack of cigarettes, shaking one out and putting it in his mouth before lighting it. "Smoke?" he asked, offering Riku the pack. Riku was just about to say no, when he caught sight of the challenging gaze Seifer was giving him. Was this all a test to see if he was cool enough to hang out with them?

"Sure," he said, despite himself. Seifer shook the pack again, and Riku took the cigarette that came out. Taking the lighter from Seifer, he mimicked him and lit it, then took a drag. After all the pot he had smoked that night, this wasn't so bad. "So, what else do you guys do?" he added, after taking a couple drags off the cigarette, while coughing a little.

"Usually just come here and sit around like these two lumps," Seifer said, motioning towards the others.

"Not much else to do, y'know?" Rai said. Fuu nodded in agreement.

"Sometimes we hang out with my brother, when he's not being a bitch," Seifer said, exhaling some more of his cigarette and blowing the smoke towards the ceiling. "Most of the parties we go to are because of him. Most of those high school bitches won't invite us."

"Yeah, I hate being in middle school," Riku said blandly, and the others nodded in agreement. Most of his cigarette was burning away, forgotten in his hand until a hot ash landed on his finger. Jumping a bit, he looked at the cigarette before taking another drag, finishing it off and putting it out in the ashtray.

"No shit, who in their right mind would like it? When we get to high school, we'll get to go to all the parties, man," Seifer said, leaning back and putting his feet up on the coffee table in front of him. He flicked his ashes onto his jeans, rubbing them in. "Just keep hanging with us, you'll be in. As long as you learn to lighten up, that is." Laughing, he gave Riku a light shove on the shoulder. Furrowing his brow, Riku extended an arm and shoved him back.

"Whatever, dude," he said, wondering how Seifer would react. To his surprise, Seifer only laughed some more.

"You'll do fine, kid," he said, ruffling Riku's hair to mess with him. "Just stick with me."

--

The next day after school, Riku found himself at Sora's house, doing homework. He thought it was dull, as they discussed simple algebra problems and the like that Sora didn't understand. He had a hard time with it, while Riku had a complete grasp on everything they covered in math. He was ready to move on to high school, and glad that his new friends agreed with him. He began to wish he were back at Seifer's, and then immediately felt a huge pang of guilt.

It seemed as though Sora had read Riku's brainwaves, however.

"What did you do over there?" he asked. Riku was thankful he didn't sound accusatory, and instead curious. Though he fudged the details a bit, he was able to give Sora an honest answer.

"Nothing."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Don't own anything. Sorry for the delay on this. Finally got around to editting it.


End file.
